We live in a land where people are continuously researching and devising new ways to measure the effectiveness of whatever they are developing, doing, or selling. Performing a market analysis will help determine if there is a market for what you are considering doing. Decisions are made based on what people are buying or downloading according to their felt need. Why invest in what people aren’t shopping for? Wouldn’t that be a ridiculous investment of our time and our resources?
What about loneliness? If you consider all things people are drinking, ingesting, injecting, digesting, inhaling, playing, working at, watching, or laughing at in order to feel better…each one has turned into million and billion-dollar industries. But do we consider the outcomes of these measures? Do any of them cure loneliness? People are getting rich off people’s felt loneliness and our addictions are just multiplying.
Why buy what doesn’t satisfy? Why invest in what just leaves you feeling lonely or worse? When I’m feeling lonely, only one thing satisfies me and rids me of my loneliness. Relationships. Developing a connected relationship with God satisfies my deepest emotional and relational needs. Once I’ve been satisfied and filled with God’s love, I can’t contain it. The Spirit of God compels me to reach out in love to connect with the people around me who also need to feel known, valued, connected, and loved. God’s love cannot be contained. It’s a love that keeps on giving. It must relationally be lived out and shared from moment to moment.
If you want to do some research, put on your noticer glasses. Look around to see how long it takes for you to find someone who looks lonely or disconnected. Or just spend a day looking around to see how many lonely and disconnected people you find. Don’t assume that people who are gainfully employed aren’t lonely. Don’t assume people who are married feel loved and connected. Don’t assume people who are wearing ear buds or are looking at their cell phones aren’t feeling lonely.
Then take the next step. Try to find a way to connect and find common ground with them. Share something you have with them, or ask them a question that makes them think, wonder, or share something from their life. Linger through quiet, awkward, or anxious feelings until you get some chances to build some connection bridges. Do some research exploring your shift from not noticing, ignoring people, and staying comfortable to taking action to connect with people who need to know someone cares and that God cares. Pay attention to the outcome and impact on you and on others.
But don’t do it because Glenn recommended it. Let your faith inspire you and compel you into the lives of hurting and lonely people Jesus died for. Ask the Holy Spirit to lead you to someone each day that needs to experience Jesus with skin on. Resist the urge to shrink back, just talk to people you already know, or reinforce your well-established defense mechanisms.
Sometimes I look for guaranteed success in order to take the plunge into the unknown with people. Then I don’t talk with them or do something new. But what if people are dying of loneliness while I’m coddling my comfort zone? What kind of faith is that? I guess if I need to have a favorable outcome in order to relationally invest in someone who appears to be lonely or disconnected, then I’m not really being Spirit-driven. I’m being outcome driven. If I think I need to feel good to do it, I’m in sad shape.
But as the Holy Spirit disrupts my comfort zone, I’m learning so much about God, people, and myself. Although it’s almost impossible to measure spiritual impact, I’m watching God and people grow me and change me one encounter at a time. The more time I invest in getting to know people, the less time I have to feel sorry for myself or to feel lonely. Here’s my invitation and challenge.
Come join me.
Let’s crush loneliness in our community.
Let go and watch what the Holy Spirit does as we reach out together in love.